Overshadowed
by Aina Riddle
Summary: HM: AWL. Village Square contest entry for the theme 'Awkward'. Jill moved to Forget-Me-Not-Valley in hopes of finding what she had been missing her whole life, a father, in Takakura. He only sees Jack when he looks at her, and life has become awkward.


**A/N: **This is my village square contest entry for the theme awkward. I hope it is suitable and enjoyable for those who read it.

**Disclaimer:** Harvest Moon does not belong to me.

**Overshadowed**

I hefted the heavy hoe to rest against my shoulder, staggering only slightly under the weight, before I exited the tool shed and headed for the field near the back of the farm. I could feel Takakura's gaze on my back and I resisted the urge to hunch my shoulders, to hide myself in order to allay the worries of the older man, allow him to see the face he insists on seeing when he looks at me. My father's face, and not mine. I don't want that, but I can't stop it.

My grip on the handle of the hoe was awkward because of the grooves worn into the wood; smooth indentations from hands much bigger and stronger than my own. "Those were your father's favorite tools. He made them himself, so I knew they would suit you." The awkward silence after his statement was broken as I broke the slightly hard, outer surface of the field, a dark and loamy soil revealing itself to be underneath. I ignored his words and tried to make him proud of _me_ as I wielded the heavy tool and attempted to till the field completely. Blisters formed as my hands rubbed against the uneven surface of the wooden handle, but I continued if only to have the thud of the hoe against the soil and my panting breaths fill the silence so it doesn't become uncomfortable (at least for me) again.

The head of the hoe rested against the ground, but I didn't break my grip on it, instead I let my body lean over the tool as I gasped for breath and tried to hide the tremors that ran through my arms from the strain I had put them through, so I kept the limbs tensed because it lessened the shaking. "You still have the seeds in your rucksack, right? Jack used to always do that, so eager to get them planted whenever he got the chance." I said nothing as I heard the older man push himself off of the fence surrounding the pasture, instead keeping my head down as I attempted to quiet my erratic breathing. "I'll go get the watering cans; it'll be just like old times…"

I finally looked up when I could no longer hear his footsteps and allowed a single tear to fall from my violet eyes as the wood handle slipped through my loosened grip, my fingers still bent before I painfully uncurled them. Takakura had sounded so happy, so proud, and I had felt like I had finally had a father, but I know all he still sees is the father I never knew. Even if my life remained filled with awkward silences, I would let the senile man see the old friend he used to have if only to one day have him realize who I really am and be proud, because I so desperately wanted a father.

* * *

"It may be none of my business, but we had planned for this farm to be a family one, so you might want to start looking for a husband soon." I looked at Takakura's face and nodded slightly before walking away, my grip on my fishing pole tight. My father had wanted this to be a family farm, but why did he abandon my mother to go off and live this life? I would've been happy living on this farm, growing up and having a father. I would've considered Takakura an uncle and he would've seen a niece, not a replacement for a lost companion. My mother had always loved the beach, and with one so near she would've been overjoyed to live here, while I would've been content with the animals…

My eyes wandered over the valley as I sat by the river, while the bobber from my fishing pole floated in the water contentedly, so unlike my own emotions. This was such a beautiful place, and yet it caused such awkward and uneasy situations with all of the memories it held. Takakura's words came to my mind again as my eyes passed over Marlin, who I know is single, and I ignored the urge to yell at him, to tell him I'm not my father and that I couldn't make sudden, spur of the moment decisions that changed the lives of others. I couldn't fall in love and create a family within a year (because he is only letting me stay here on a trial basis for only a year) just to satisfy the dream I didn't have with him. I couldn't abandon who I was just to get something that may never be; the dream of having at least a father figure.

My attention was caught as my bobber disappeared and I set about catching my lunch. I couldn't change anything because this place was all I had now. My mother was dead and my father never existed in my life until now, overshadowing me and causing my life to feel foreign to even me. As Marlin's reflection was caught in the stream when the fish hit my net, I knew that I would at least try to satisfy Takakura's vision and engaged the farmhand in conversation. My life was not mine to live anymore.

* * *

"Will you marry me?" I examined Marlin, his hair wet from the snow outside as he held out my blue feather. The tension built up in the room as he waited for my answer and my eyes fell upon the still light windows of Takakura's cottage. This was what he had wanted. The farm was doing well and I was set to be married to a man that, no matter how hard I tried, I still didn't love. The dark haired man before me shuffled his feet awkwardly and I felt pity for him since I knew that feeling all too well, but for once I decided to go with my own decision. I couldn't live this life anymore and be faced with awkward situations like this. I'm not my father and I don't ever want to be.

"No, I'm sorry, but no," I said as my eyes fell to look at the ground. A soft scratch against the wood and a sigh of relief before Marlin's footsteps echoed across the floor.

"I'm glad you finally decided; make sure to visit when you get the chance." With that he left and I knew that he had not wanted a marriage between us either, that he had just proposed so I would have a reason to stay like I had wanted until now. I smiled at the door and grabbed my rucksack as well as my money pouch and coat before I scribbled down a message and left the small cottage, my dog following behind me faithfully. I slipped the letter beneath Takakura's door before I scooped my dog into my arms and headed for the inn. I no longer lived at this farm, so I could no longer stay. I heard Takakura's booted feet walking towards his door and I quickened my pace, making sure I was out of sight. I'm done with awkward situations.

_**Dear Takakura,**_

_**My name is Jill Mendir and I have been living at this farm for a year. I fear that you have always thought of me as Jack, the father I had never met. I'm sorry that I am not him and that I will never be him. My life is mine to live, as I've just realized, and now I know that this is not what I want. I'm tired of being overshadowed by a man who had abandoned his family; tired of the awkward silences when you would compare me to my father or treat me as if I was him. I'm not even sure if you noticed that I never spoke to you for fear that you would realize your pride and trust were misplaced, because I was so desperate to have a father. 10, that's exactly how many conversations I had with you over this past year, and most of them were but a few words. I'm sorry I couldn't be your lost friend or even a new friend, and I'm sorry I was not suitable to be seen as a daughter. Sleep well.**_

_**Sincerely, Jill**_

_**P.S. I am staying at Ruby's inn as I no longer live on this farm. We will negotiate over property rights and everything tomorrow, after I finish taking with the realtor over in Mineral Town about the farm I wish to buy over there. I wish to keep my animals, as I've become attached to them all, but I do not want to leave you with nothing… We can discuss this tomorrow as well.**_

* * *

**A/N:** I had the idea that maybe Takakura could be a bit senile and see Jack whenever he saw Jill, he even said that they were very similar. The situation would've been very awkward in my opinion, especially the requirement of marrying within a year, which is actually in the game.


End file.
